Apologies Again

Apologies for yet another break.
I'm sorry.

When I went back to doctor I had lost two pounds. It took a month, and there was of course some differential due to clothing, but it was a change and in the right direction.

The doctor had done a full thyroid panel; there is nothing showing up there. Good news on one hand, but also a little strange. For a period, I had low thyroid, and okay, what made it start working again? Is it working properly? How long will it work and having low thyroidworries, health symptoms already how will I know if it stops again?

What if whatever made it start to work makes it start to overwork?

Anyway, the next step is seeing a urologist. That appointment has been made, Feb 1. From my research, that is the next step in seeking out a metabolic disorder that isnt showing up anything on routine testing, so I'm okay with that.

I would really like to cut straight through to seeing an endocrinologist, but one has to go through the proper steps. Unless one is independently wealthy of course, and gets to tell the professionals what to do.

The holidays and cold and my back going out haven't helped in establishing any equilibrium, I'm sorry to say, but I am hoping that is under control now.

Thank you all for your support.

Changes

I've been trying a few basic changes.

The results thus far rather are less than encouraging.

I have switched to wheat bread instead of white, and pretty much cut potatoes out. Not completely, but down to twice a week at most. Trying the not-white concept.
Also eating soup and crackers.

The results?

I am sleeping 15 hours a day.
Muscle spasms in my upper back (just below my shoulder blade on my right.)
Increased hip pain, both sides, but more on my right.
Something jumping around inside my rib cage (like a baby kicking) whenever I am lying down.
Not much energy for not much of anything. (most likely related to the sleeping, although unsure of the relationship.)
My heart pounding over the least exertion and extreme breathlessness. One of my prescriptions has expired, and I am stuck in the middle of the pharmacy says this and the doctor's says that and either neither is listening to the other, or no one at all is listening to me. (Nothing new there.)

I don't think most of this is related to the dietary changes. I think most of it is related to the need for dietary changes.

I swear that I can actually feel my metabolism slowing down. I wonder how slow one's metabolism gets before organ failure starts to happen. (Especially with a baby in my chest.)
My metabolism is currently averaging sloth; heading toward slug.

Or maybe I'm just trying to hibernate. It's done turned February cold in mid-December.
If that's the case, I have done my body a disservice changing those lovely snow colored carbs for dirt colored ones. Bears pack on the carbs to live off of while sleeping.

I have my next doctor visit on the 18th, and a visit to my cardiologist on January 17.

Thank goodness for Tammy and the kids. They won't let me turn into no more than a quivering lump.

Something Different

Trying something new. A half-step between a fast and a liquid diet. I'd try an all out fast, but I don't think that would work. As a matter of fact, I did have a hypoglycemic drop and am hoping some soup will stop that. If not, I will have to eat.
If I don't dissolve into a puddle first.

Overall, it hasn't been too bad. I did have a couple of slips -- an edge of a cookie I unwrapped for Warren, and a handful of popcorn, again meant for Warren. I should probably also count the blue stained fingers. Icing from the cookie. (No actual icing, but it was somehow my job to suck his fingertips clean. Kids are weird.) That may have been just enough sugar to cause enough of a spike to trigger the drop.

This may be an effective tool, if I can remember to remember not to eat -- and maybe do it only on days the little guy will be at school. It hasn't been as difficult as I thought it would be. And, no, that isn't because I ate until 11:59 before starting the fast.

I did maintain a variety of fluids -- milk, water, diet pop, coffee, tea. To some that may be cheating; to others it's permissible. It depends on what model you are following. No sugar in any of the drinks.
that would indeed have spiked my sugar and induced a drastic drop. Possibly the milk played a part, although it was a long time difference, which is outside of the norm for me. Also only a few sips of milk, twice, to provide a flavor.

I think i may be a flavor addict.
That's an odd thought, since I don't like things spicy. Maybe the spices mask the ability to savor the flavors?

The biggest problem, so far, other than the sugar drop, has been that if nothing solid goes in, nothing solid comes out. And if it isn't solid, when it wants out, it's in a hurry.

Maybe I should count that as my exercise for today, or at least part of it?

Discouraged

After my visit to the doctor Monday (rescheduled from the day of missteps) I am so Disappointed, despondent and depressed. Have gained weight and not just a little bit. Still swollen in the legs. blood pressure good, heartbeat 'within normal parameters'. Still a bit of a murmur.

I brought up the weight gain.
I brought up how it is out of proportion with what I eat and do.

And i got the same old they-aren't-listening-to-me garbage about diet and exercise.
Was suggested that I write down what I eat. (Duh.) (Check mark)
Was suggested I always include a protein when I eat. (Check mark)
Was suggested that I eat frequently instead of one or two big meals. (Check mark)
Didn't really feel believed, but that could just be me.

I guess I should look at it like I'm doing the right things, I suppose.

I shouldn't call the diet and exercise garbage. There is validity to it -- I'm not saying there isn't. I'm really not.  But it is not the be-all and end-all solution to weight problems.
There are other causes and concerns that are weight related. Thyroid, pituitary, thalamus, kidney or liver disease (or deterioration).

Heredity.

Looking at the pictures from our trips, I think I am taking on the body silhouette of my mother's Aunt
Gladys. She had several glandular problems, and that was back in the day, before many of those had legitimately been accepted.

I can't be sure without seeing actual pictures of her in her later years, and I doubt there are many of those floating around. The idea could be wishful thinking on my part, another way to escape responsibility. (Not that that's something I do on a regular basis.)

Of course, it would also be another factor to be considered as part of a weight loss regimen.

So, I go into Thanksgiving week edging ever closer to 300. This is not a goal I wish to meet. I need to reverse this. And quickly.

I refuse to be 300.

kid busy

Last two  days have been kid busy. For whatever reason, my house is the place to be. Warren's been a regular little sweetheart, although just being around his energy can drain me, after a while.
Hailey's been here, too, after a long dry spell.

I love it. I love having them, and I love feeding them -- keeps me from having leftovers, donchaknow? But oh, lordy, Mr. Bub the builder can sure wreck a room with his creations. And i have to laugh as his imagination expands. His castles have become houses or persons, and we throw books and cars and other things into Imagination Central, so all sorts of stories, thoughts, and ideas come out.
It's a fascinating process.

News of a death today. Very sad to hear of that. A writing friend met online.

Between feeding them my leftovers and cleaning up after them I'm not not-meeting my goals. I'm not increasing anything either, but hey, things take time. Factor in a case of the dont-feel-goods and fluctuating weather -- yeah. I'm not doing badly at all.
I just could be doing better.

But isn't that always true?

One of Those Days 11/16/17

Let me tell you about my day.Which is not over yet.

Bought some (used) pants the other day. Wore a pair yesterday. Picked them up to put them on this morning before my shower and ripped one leg off the back.

Went out to go to Dr. Checked car, put brake fluid in, everything else good -- except for the left rear tire. Flat. (Really, are my tires going flat in order of rotation? How weird is that?)

Had to borrow Tammy's car for the trip.

Went to the Dr. my appointment was at 1:45, not the 2:45 I showed up for. No more openings today. (that's what happens when a blind woman writes on the calendar. 1s become 2s) I don't know what excuse to offer for not noticing the reminder texts that each say 1:45. I suppose I must not have looked at them, once I realized they were reminder texts.

Stopped at Dollar General to get glue and stickers, because my lil guy has to decorate a turkey. And Grandma usually has those things, but sometimes you run out. Walked out of the store leaving my bag behind, after carefully putting the cart away.

School buses all the way home. Well, half the way. I finally got smart enough to get on 32. Lots of traffic there though. I hate traffic.

The big event of the evening was decorating the turkey. The decorations were supposed to be like clothing or a costume, but it didnt quite turn out thaat way. 

First of all, since it's a family project, we got Hailey involved. Hailey, for those who don't know, is quite a little artist in the making. She draws and has an eye for color. at age 5 or 6, she taught herself to draw My Little Ponys by/from watching how-to YouTube videos.

It was hard to keep her from taking over the project. She did take over doing the gluing , which was a very good thing. I let Warren have a couple other papers and he pretty much spread/spilled/poured glue all over the paper. And then pouted when I put the glue away.

If it were up to Warren, the turkey would have been Argus-eyed. That boy's a little goofy about eyeballs, and I had bought some googly eyes for him to use. Because he's a little goofy about eyes, of course.

sorry, cant rotate it

Hailey placed the eyes appropriately, and glued on pom poms and stars all around Mr. Turkey. She did remember, every now and then, to ask Warren what color he wanted, or where something should go, but she did most of the work, while Warren was happily gluing eyeballs to the other page. 

After Hailey went home, Warren took an eyeball he won at a Halloween party -- not a glue-on or stick-on-- a big round eyeball -- and stuck it smack-dab in the middle of the turkey. That thing took a pile of glue, and it's probably not going to stick although it was staying on while he was running back and forth from the bus stop this morning.

Made sloppy joes and fries for supper for the three of us.

Plenty of moving around, what with doctors visits and flat tires and shopping. No time for snacking and such, as I was busily busy with other things. So, a good day on the diet and exercise front. That was probably the best thing about it.

The turkey was the funnest part. 

Back. I Hope.

Sorry for the break. My second surgery discombobulated my vision too much for me to be able to do anything at all for very long. Plus internet problems, and then my computer 'broke' and -- one thing after another, the way it usually happens.

But, today, finally got me glasses and life looks better. Or, at least, I can see it.

Not a whole lot to report right now. I have managed to boost my activity a bit. It's got to the point where I get restless and edgy if I haven't been a degree of active. So, getting a little more housecleaning done, go up and down the steps a few times a day.

Eating has mostly been tomato soup, sometimes with grilled cheese, sometimes not. And popcorn for a snack. And some pizza here and there.

Starting to do some holiday cooking, have made a couple batches of fudge. Have not eaten any, save a couple small samples to see how the chocolate was setting. (Not super-very-well, as it happens, but okay.)

Now is time to jump back in and start getting things done. Making changes. Be nice if I could be running marathons by New Year's, but I'll settle for walking to the bus stop without back spasms and SOB.

Sounds like a goal to me.

Busy-ness

Yesterday evening was Family Night at the school, and the were offering free refreshments. one hot dog and 5 potato chips per person. Good for the diet, of course, and the price was right, but one can't help but wonder how many parents got their families together and routed out because there would be hot dogs only to find that they would get one apiece. Later they added a small bag of popcorn to the mix. And for drinks there was orange soda, lemonade, or water. There were also Styrofoam hot cups on the table, but I neither saw nor smelled any coffee anywhere at any time. And I was watching/looking for it.

They had places for pictures -- a cowboy/old west motif -- and books and games and puzzles and things for the kids. Our kids made pictures with bats and punkins. Hailey won a book. They kept encouraging us (me) to check out the hppy table for Warren. Hppy is home prep for preschool. Warren is already in Head Start. Too bad, too. I wanted to get in the drawing for a wagon for enrollees in that program. The wagon on display was full of books. I don't know if they were included in the drawing or were perhaps a separate drawing of some sort. Wouldn't that -- both or either -- end up being an awesome Christmas present? But, having no eligible preschooler, I had to pass and let the prize go to someone who actually qualified for it.

Sigh ~ RULES! ~ sigh.

I did more sitting than walking, but still did some walking and even -- gasp -- a teensy bit of socializing.
Finally, home again later and had some toast before bed. Also took out the garbage, even going next door and dragging over an extra garbage can.
Took a shower at my final getting-up-for-the-day. I generally hate morning showers. Always took one the night before when I had a morning thing.
Today had a can of meatball skettios in tomato sauce. With crackers. Had milk in my coffee.

Then I cleaned house. Gathered laundry, swept, dishes, more trash taken out.  i put down carpet cleaner powder stuff.
I washed dishes.
I wiped counters.
I sorted this and put away that.
Threw away some theses and rescued some thoses.
I even cleaned out the bottom of the refrigerator!

Most of it while keeping Warren amused and entertained and playing gramma- warren -- gramma -- warren -- gramma -- warren endlessly. Then he found a ball and decide he was a puppy who wanted to play fetch. Except the ball wouldn't fit in his mouth (thank god) so he just held it in his hand in front of his mouth until I threw it again.

Went to store before Tam's work, and got a 3 strip meal from Lee's for my supper and my snack later.
And herre I am now.

Today = less food/frequency, and more doing. Nothing dramatic or especially big, but all steps in the right direction.

And Now ... Thursday

How did that happen? Between ongoing internet issues, doctor visits, school, and general ennui, the days have slipped away. Can't let that happen here; this is for accountability.

Can't find my notebook where I list my eating -- also not good. Probably a kid borrowed it for writing or drawing in. If I hadn't lost three days, it wouldn't be a big deal. I'd be able to come close on memory alone. Probably not perfect, but close.

Tuesday: Leg doctor. I guess I should say knee doctor. She wasn't interested  in the rest of my leg, as in how it feels like my hip is going to tear through flesh and muscle when I walk, nor in how it feels as if the muscle is ripping away from my femur when I stand. My knee is better, and she is willing to give me a release to work. Never mind that, knee or not, I still can't stand for an extended period of time without intense, disabling pain.

If I want her to address these/this issue, I need to start a new case.
Huh?
I blame in part the specialty changing to "sports medicine", where everything is a different injury. Once upon a time, a long long time ago, the specialty was bones or bones and muscles together . Orthopedics? Osteopathy? Anyway, it's all in the blaming and the billing, not about the suffering of the patient.
(And this is one of the best specialty practices available in this area for this type injury!)

Anyway, after dr. visit, Tammy and I had lunch at a little place called Maddy's Pizza in Sardinia. Fantastic food, nice clean place, and a server who looked, moved, and sounded like a young version of one of my Margaret friends. They offered a BLT hoagy, with 12 slices of bacon as well as mayo, l, and t. I made two meals and a snack out of that paired with french fries -- also superbly, supremely delicious. The hoagy bun instead of sliced bread was nice. And there were no $5 burgers, although they would have been more worth it than many a one.
Finished out the day with a couple of those microscopic candy bars.

Wednesday; yesterday. A weird sleepy day, and I don't remember much of what I ate. A peanut butter sandwich, some chips, and later on two slices of pizza. Drank milk and coffee mostly.

Today, so far, I have had a bacon, egg,& cheese on a bun and a pack of poptarts. 

The Outernet

Because it's been out more than it has been in. Makes posting a blog -- or just finding the blog -- an impossible dream.
Blame it on the wind, the weather, the frontier, the existence of the trailer park we all live in. Who knows? It's somewhat logical that living in a row or four of tin cans can muck up the WiFi. Isn't that the purpose of the tinfoil hats worn by the loonies? (As an added bonus, the tin cans and tinfoil are both mostly aluminum. Haha)

Anyway, a good day Sunday. Definitely stepped up my activity -- dragged stuff out to the curb, cleaned the yard, did some housework. Had the rest of my pizza and some french fries, and a can of soup, and two 'fun' sized candy bars. I think the fun may be in seeing how many can be out into the mouth at one time, but I dunno. There's really nothing fun about two bites and gone.

Today -- getting cold. Someone somewhere figured out how to turn off summer. Yesterday was 80; there are frost advisories out for overnight tonight.

had chili a big bowl, some snacky candybars that still weren't fun, and egg salad on crackers, about a half pack. Went to the store today and picked up a few more groceries -- bread and milk stuff. Did some dishes. Played with Warren a few hours -- that kid takes a lot of energy even if i just sit to play. Sure does make me smile though.

Tomorrow the leg doctor.

Friday the 13th, and then Saturday

Not a bad day.

had a slice of bread, a lot of egg salad, pocorn, and ice cream for eats. pop and coffee, as usual, for drinks. I also put away my laundry, cleaned my living room, and took a shower in my creaky bathtub. I wonder how difficult it would be to put safety bars in and around my tub. And how expensive.

today (Saturday) I've had two cheeseburgers and four slices of pizza. pop to drink; no coffee. Went to a church rummage sale, walked from the building to the parking lot two round trips. Walked around a bit in building, although i did have to sit a few times.

Both days went up and down my back steps multiple times to go open his house door for Warren.

Am having difficulty getting into a timing routine for this and other stuff. My mind feels sort of congested. Sinusitis of the brain. I'd like to blame it on October, on this particular week of the year. I'd like to, but for some reason that excuse doesn't feel right. Or it feels like exactly that: an excuse, not a reason.

Wednesday 10/11 and Thursday 10/12

Wednesday was my check up on my right eye, so I went out to lunch with my sister/chauffeur. We went to LaRosa's, after yet another failed attempt to try AA Hitching Post. We were even joking on the way about what excuse there would be for not being open  THIS TIME. 

There was no excuse. They just weren't open. On the way out, we saw that their hired sign was blank also. If anyone wants to have a business, it usually works better to actually be open sometimes.

Anyway, we ended up at LaRosa's. I had a small meat pizza and french fries, with a diet coke. Bleah. I could only eat half of it and we took the remainder with us. It ended up being my supper as well. Had two of the little cups of ice cream at some point. And in the early morning hours, a can of tomato soup.

So, it wasn't really a pig out day as much as it was a keep-going day. 

Today, Thursday, I had a cheese sandwich, chicken noodle soup, 3 cheese coneys, and two ice creams. We had a Head Start meeting at the library today, and had to do some back and forth with the school, and while there was no great exercise today, there was also no napping. Got to keep Warren for a bit while Mom went to store, and then after she went to work. He had me hopping up and down, let me tell you. I guess I can count that as exercise. 

I'm planning some toast for my midnight snack around 4, unless Tam and I go to the store after she gets off work. Probably not, because she is going to be dead on her feet, and cant go to bed until about 9. She may need caffeine to make it, though. If I do get anything else, I'll report it tomorrw.

Internet Out

I haven't abandoned my goals here. My internet has been acting up, as in not allowing much by way of posting, if it will even bring a page up.

10/9 Monday. Renamed Columbus Day, or Canadian Thanksgiving. Glad it wasn't here-Thanksgiving -- it's kind of early in the plan to disrupt the plan for a ritual feast.  To drink I had coffee, pop, and kool-aid. Wendy's for lunch -- burger and fries. A ham and cheese sandwich, spaghetti with garlic bread, and a couple of tiny candy bars. Warren doesn't have school on Mondays, so spent a lot of the day with him.
For exercise I ended the day with a walk through Kroger's fancy ass store. No diamond rings at 5 am, also no coffeecake. Darn, I really did want some of that. Oh well.

10/10 Tuesday. Doom day. Hell day. If there's a day that bad can happen, this is it. Of course, the bad doesn't happen just on this day, and just because it's 10/10 doesn't mean something bad will happen -- even good things can happen on this date. But it's a Day of Shadows for me. Some of the shadows are tall and dark and black, others are thin flickers. I guess it depends on the weather that particular year!

Food was ham sandwiches and tomato soup with crackers. Also some toast. Also a cup of ice cream. I bought a package of the little cups in yet another attempt at portion control. It usually doesn't work, but so far so good. For exercise I did another walk through Kroger, and also lapped Family Dollar. Pop to drink. hot tea.

Tomorrow I will post for today, as the day hasn't yet ended. I have to confess, today was kind of a pig out day on this new regimen. 

10/8/17 Applies to Apples

Internet quit on me last night before i could post.

Sunday was a long slow day, both for eating and moving. I slept pretty late and took two long naps. I ate one pop-tart (Warren had the other) a bowl of cereal, some toast, and later in the day soup and a sandwich ham&cheese. And another pack of pop tarts. Did get out to go to store in the evening. But that is about it, for activity. Believe me, standing and staying to cook soup and make sandwich rather drained me.

Tummy was somewhat better, but still grumbly and achy. I'm still thinking it was the sudden influx of fruit that caused that, and am unsure how to proceed there. The fruits I like are not good keepers and that's a problem when on a monthly income. Not just the planned budgeting (and when does a budget not encounter blips and minor emergencies?), there is also the fact that prices change, as does availability. Watermelon (yum) season is giving way to Pumpkin Time. Other melons are losing ground or reverting to imported or forced-growth more expensive options. Apple prices are already ridiculous, hopefully that is because it is near the end of last year's and haven't begun this year's harvest yet.
Hey, I can hope.

Apples are ridiculous for other reasons. All these kinds and types and sorts, these are good for raw eating, these are good for stewing, those for baking.
Do they not make apples anymore. Plain, ordinary general all-purpose apples?
Does the color of the peel really matter when the apples are peeled before being used or eaten?

I admit it is nice to counter the tartness of a mackintosh with the sweetness of a crumbly crust in a good pie. And sweet apples usually perk up a salad. The red peel can add a nice pop of color if there are no tomatoes or radishes (which are not usually present in salads containing apples or raisins)

But most stores only carry a few of the too-many kinds of apples, and the packaging only rarely tells what the apples within are best used for. It can be a gamble.
Of course, you'd be gambling to just buy generic apples as well, but you would much likely pay less and you would also know to expect that.


Well time will tell. Apples and oranges do tend to come down in price during the holidays, although they have also gone up when hurricanes and droughts have interfered with the harvests and the fruits are not as munificent as usual.

I'll get this. It's just going to take learning and time.

10/7/17

5 am  biscuits
10am biscuit&gravy
1 pm popcorn
4 pm soup & steak fries
7 pm breakfast bowl
11 pm cereal.
At various times; snack size candy bars. 6 or 8. Anything to stop the cramping.

Not feeling well. My stomach hurts, like someone kicked me there. i could double over. easily. I don't, because I'm supposed to be keeping my head above my heart. More specifically, my right eye. I looked it up today, ten days to two weeks before bending and stooping is considered okay. Rule of thumb, anyway. One site said up to a month; other said at least a week. Most said two weeks.

Now, at one o'clock Sunday morning, listening to the rain and wind and thunder, I'd like to think it's the weather made me have the feel-bads. But my belly still feels kicked right in the center, and I still just dont feel good.

I think I have eaten too much fruit. Not used to that. Next time I will know to buy smaller portions or to buy things that will keep better. Even though five dollars for six or eight apples is an absolutely ridiculous price for what is, after all, a home-grown or nearly local product.

Went to store for activity.

10/6/17

5 am breakfast bowl
11am cereal with milk
3 pm grilled cheese and tomato soup
7 pm 3 tacos (homemade)
10pm fruit
12 am steak fries

drinks: diet pepsi and kool aid.

went up and down front steps three times in a row. dishes, assembled dirty laundry,

not a great day for much. had to force me into doing the steps, but ti is important to me to do something/anything. to have something to report here, so i guess the accountability thing is working somewhat. would like to have more enthusiasm. ah well, maybe another day and all the days hereafter

Thursday

Great start to the day. Found instant oatmeal packet in my cabinet, so I got to have some breakfast for breakfast. That was a nice change.
Had good ol' pb&j for brunch.

Walked over to the mailbox today. YAY ME! Got off my ol' fat butt and moved it. Didn't do to, bad either -- got all the way to the street over there before i had to stop for a breather. Had to pause a couple of times on the way back, and my hip was achy by the time I had to mount my steps, but hey, it's a start. right. And at least I did it.

Had an airhead for lunch. Found it in my box of tools. And black coffee.

Went to store. two or three trips from car, up my steps, into house, carrying bags. More walking/moving/exercise. Yay me!

Ham-turkey-cheese sandwich for supper, with bananas and chocolate milk.  Kids came over and had bananas and chocolate milk, too.

Mixed fresh fruits for midnight snack. Watermelon (yum), cantaloupe, strawberry, pineapple. Coffee with milk to drink.

That is my eating & exercise report for today.

Enough with the PB&J

6am: pb&j and a york peppermint patty
10am:pb&j
2pm: pb&j

7pm: weak and wobbly, cold sweat. need to eat probably low sugar. No, I don't want anymore peanut butter and jelly! I don't think I even want a sandwich at this point. Of any type. 5-way and fries from carryout, as Tam's family had gone there for a rare night out.

Drinks: diet pop and black coffee and hot tea. one coffee cup of kool-aid.

Will have another York peppermint patty after a while -- probably around 2, from the looks of this schedule.

Peanut butter and jelly is good, and one can make it different -- spread one thicker, one thinner, regular bread or toast, premixed before spread on the bread. Crunchy or creamy. Jelly or jam. different flavors even, if you are lucky. But it's still peanut butter and it's still jelly. Makes eating a bit unappetizing at the end of the day.

Still its better than nothing, and at least it does have flavor. One should not complain too much, lest one loses even that.

Eyes are doing well, better than I expected. Been computering without glasses. Most of the day. Reading with glasses, with the 'fixed' eye covered. a napkin under the glasses makes an acceptable eye patch. Seeing halos with porch lights and head lights and such. Funny thing is, the halos aren't around the lights, they are in some way alongside. For example the porch light across the way looks like there are Christmas lights around a back window as well as a porch light.  the headlights are really funny though. Every vehicle looks like its being escorted by energy balls where the tires are. porcupines made of light.
It's a really odd sight.

And yesterday brought both death and birth in the family; both matters are being kept private. October strikes again.

Eye see -- Not Today

Had my first cataract surgery today. Involved fasting, as most surgery does. And then a pigout.

Had the breakfast bar at Frisch's. Mostly proteins, followed by fruit, but i did sneak in a few potatoes. And some cottage cheese. One biscuit and gravy. They didnt have banana slices in strawberry glaze. Peaches and pears were canned and served in syrup.  delicious.

Later I had two slices of pizza.

That was it for today.

Just as well, as the surgery, even though in my eye, has a lot of restrictions on activity.
NO:
bending
lifting
stooping
carrying
jolting
jostling

until i see the doctor again next week.
So that leaves out all but the most mild forms of exercise, and even that can be fraught. Walking can lead to stumbling and falling, especially when your vision needs to adapt to new parameters. (I hope that word works here; I cant think of another, better one.)

Even my lil guy throwing himself at me was a little scary, because of the jolting jostling thing, but hey, it's good to be missed!

First Monday

Monday is not really a good day to start things around here, because my little bratsoboy doesnt have school. That means -- YAY! MOMMAWZ!
That means blocks stacked back out, books, carried back out, food and drink fetched and put away and fetched again.
That means watching TV on mommawz computer while mommawz tries to do other stuff, but can't, because of the feeding and the reading, donchaknow?

Plus, on the national front, today really bad, a massacre in Las Vegas, and Tom Petty.
I hate October.
(Except for the trees, the weeds, and the smells)

Today I ate two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, a Little Debbie nutty bar pack, toast, burger&fries&nuggets from Wendy's, and ice cream. I drank diet pop and black coffee. This is from 6 am to 10 pm.

Did not walk to bus stop (duh) nor to mail box. Did go up and down front steps twice.

Not a good start, and my house is not nice, and who knows what tomorrow will bring -- tomorrow is the first eye surgery for cataracts. No more food or drink until whenever.

But, bad as it is, there is my accounting for today. 

Hello

hello.
I am going to try this for accountability. My natural laziness and lack of discipline is catching up with me in so many areas of my life, I am inviting you all to hold me accountable for my failures.

I need to do something. My weight is creeping up again. Actually, it is nit creeping, it is skyrocketing, and that is not acceptable to me.

My productivity is down, and my basic caretaking skills are falling by the wayside. I cannot permit this to be me, and I am taking action.

My sister did a weight loss journey blog, and it helped her tremendously, so I am following in her footsteps. With the blog, and hopefully with the weight loss success.

When and where have I drawn this line? I have always been big, and even after my last pregnancy -- nearly 30 years ago, I have been seriously overweight by the numbers.
Now, I don't like or trust numbers, they can be manipulated. (1 pregnant woman, 9 virgins. Statistically, the virgins are 1/10 pregnant and the pregnant one is 9/10 virgin. Yeah.)

BUT -- basic health I understand, and when my weight goes over a certain point I have health problems. It is the health problems that have me restarting on this journey today.

It is likely that my thyroid is again laying down on the job. Laziness may be a glandular failure, not a life-choice. Unfortunately, the month of October is already devoted to a different health problem so that will have to be checked later.
I already have the appointment scheduled.

New month, new week, changes already in the works.
We will see how it goes.

Give me hell, people.
Help me be and do my best.

Thank you.