Not Feeling too good

today has been weird, health wise. Woke up groggy, when I finally woke up. Blood pressure pretty low on first two readings -- needs to be watched. Lowering bp was why they first adjusted the first diuretics dosages, and this may be (or may not) a repeat of that. It did come up and stay up once I was up and moving around a bit.
My sugar is higher than I'm used to, too, My metabolism is seriously out of sync. I can feel that every day. Watch the numbers, watch the numbers. (Now, my numbers aren't all that bad -- one of my sisters would like to have my numbers, and her doctor would congratulate her if she did -- but they are running high for me, for the most part since just before I went to dr last week.)
I already have two more dr appointments set up regarding these changes, and everyone should be on the same page. one never knows for sure about communication on the other side.
Anyway, I'm off to write on one of my four stories, at least, and maybe all four of them until I fall both asleep and out of my chair. Actually, there's only three Works in Progress -- number four is an idea that is just beginning to germinate. I do wish it wouldn't, at least until the others have blossomed a little more (and maybe the one 'out there' begins to bear fruit) But, hey, it's spring. And Spring is all about germinating and growth that leads to blooming and bearing, so I guess I can't complain too much. Not justifiably, anyway.
So that's me for today.
Hope everyone else is doing even better

                                                                                               

                                                            

This Stinks

And, by this, I mean me.

Not just me, but quite likely, a lot of old(er) people and anyone on metabolism-changing medicine.

It's not quite an accepted fact, but there is anecdotal support for the idea. Ask anyone who is taking any of those medicines. They will often complain of, or just comment on, changes in their personal scent. Metformin, statins, beta blockers, insulin or insulin substitutes, thyroid supplements, even, in some cases, the proton pump inhibitors used for GERD or even 'just' excess gas.
Any of these drugs that are involved in the basic working of your basic cellular functions can and often do affect the smell given off by your body.

It's not unprecedented.
Persons in ketoacidosis are often reported to smell sweet.
Of course many hormonal disturbances are known to cause these changes. Ask any woman who has used birth control, or gone through pregnancy, and/or menopause.

Nearly everyone knows some old person that just has that old person smell. I'm not sure, at this point, if that old person smell is from the shutting down of the normal metabolic process, or of it's from the artificially induced revamping of said process. It is most likely a combination of both, or it could be either/or. After all, old people smell has been around as long as there have been old people.

I've been especially aware of this lately because it is something I have always had an issue with.
Stress hormones are real, and I am someone who finds just speaking to people to be extremely stressful. Throw in working or driving, or doing math (my first jobs involved a lot of arithmetic!), and one could probably see the stench rolling off me like the fumes off Pepe LePew.

It seems to be a family thing, as I've noticed it in my daughters and have even become suspicious that my grandson may have this unfortunate condition. Thank goodness he's a boy, because males are generally given more room when it comes to natural fragrance. (At least for now. The way the world is going, it may be a social crime fr him to not smell of flowers and lemons when he is grown. I hope not.)

Anyway, to all those offended -- Yes, I see you flinch and inch away from me; in the schoolroom, in the grocery store, in the library, at the doctor's offices -- it's not my fault.

I'm sorry.

I am clean.
I wash several times a day.
Use deodorant.

I'm sorry.

Remember that you too may be old someday and your body will do things you'd rather it didn't.

Remember that you may reap what you sow.
I hope you choose compassion and sympathy and understanding.
I hope you can be thoughtful and supportive.
I hope no one flinches to get away from you.
I hope no one avoids you when you are already isolated by what you cannot do anymore.

Because now we don't even have talcum powder.

Not Quite Anything

Well, my fitness goals have had to undergo a few adjustments. They are not being abandoned, nor are they to be deemed completely impossible or unattainable.

BUT...
This long winter and my ongoing health problems, which worsened with the cold and windy and generally unstable weather conditions, have sent me on a journey.

The nutshell version is that my heart is giving out. Heart Failure.

There is no cause for this. No blocked arteries; no malfunctioning valves; no infection or obvious inflammation of the heart muscle; no structural damages; no prolonged bouts of high blood pressure. The one short spurt of high blood pressure was quickly brought under control -- and that was five years ago. (underactive thyroid.)

In the early 2000s (I'm thinking 03 or 04) I had a bad bout of walking pneumonia and a few months later had a heart murmur and a 'slightly enlarged' heart. No structural damage, and as time passed, the condition resolved itself.

I had an anomalous heart problem in October of 08 or 09. There was an acknowledgement of a 'syndrome'. But there were no observable malfunctions, obstructions, or anything that could be diagnosed and treated.

I later had another bout of prolonged pneumonia. And another heart murmur with enlargement of the right ventricle. This set off a whole array of symptoms and tests, but the results were the same. No structural damage. And, once again, the condition resolved.

This may have happened another time -- after so many years and all the things that have happened in the last few years, memories merge or muddle. It has happened enough that there is a faint pattern.

So now I have the symptoms and the struggles of congestive heart failure. The symptoms are somewhat worse than they have been, and show no signs of resolving at this time. I am retaining fluids, and other systems are being affected. My liver is awash.But there are still no signs of structural damage or physical cause. It's hard to breathe, especially when I change position. The fluid (congestion) residing in my pericardium squooshes my lungs until I can adjust. My C-PAP has been doing a wonderful job of keeping the fluids OUT of my lungs, so there is that.

There is no prognosis.
It's even fallen short of an actual diagnosis.

I have the symptoms of heart failure.
I am receiving/doing treatments for heart failure.
Treatments are as effective as they can be, all things considered. (CHF can be a temperamental condition, until it gets into the later stages.)

One part of the treatment is mild exercise as can be tolerated.
Sure wish I still had my gazelle, or my pedals, or something of that sort.
I can still walk.
On days that I actually can walk.
Hopefully I can build up endurance, and will be able to walk in the woods and hike in the hills.
Maybe someday I'll even be able to walk all the way through Kroger's store without muscle spasms and gasping like a fish.
Maybe.
I figure mountain climbing is out, though.
Deep sea diving may or may not work, depending on depth. The piped in air is part of advanced treatment of cardiopulmonary issues, after all.
Not so sure about skydiving. All that thinner atmosphere and atmospheric pressure.

That's the plan, and it IS an achievable goal (within reason.)

I'm still trying.

Changes

I've been trying a few basic changes.

The results thus far rather are less than encouraging.

I have switched to wheat bread instead of white, and pretty much cut potatoes out. Not completely, but down to twice a week at most. Trying the not-white concept.
Also eating soup and crackers.

The results?

I am sleeping 15 hours a day.
Muscle spasms in my upper back (just below my shoulder blade on my right.)
Increased hip pain, both sides, but more on my right.
Something jumping around inside my rib cage (like a baby kicking) whenever I am lying down.
Not much energy for not much of anything. (most likely related to the sleeping, although unsure of the relationship.)
My heart pounding over the least exertion and extreme breathlessness. One of my prescriptions has expired, and I am stuck in the middle of the pharmacy says this and the doctor's says that and either neither is listening to the other, or no one at all is listening to me. (Nothing new there.)

I don't think most of this is related to the dietary changes. I think most of it is related to the need for dietary changes.

I swear that I can actually feel my metabolism slowing down. I wonder how slow one's metabolism gets before organ failure starts to happen. (Especially with a baby in my chest.)
My metabolism is currently averaging sloth; heading toward slug.

Or maybe I'm just trying to hibernate. It's done turned February cold in mid-December.
If that's the case, I have done my body a disservice changing those lovely snow colored carbs for dirt colored ones. Bears pack on the carbs to live off of while sleeping.

I have my next doctor visit on the 18th, and a visit to my cardiologist on January 17.

Thank goodness for Tammy and the kids. They won't let me turn into no more than a quivering lump.